Me & her relationship....remains rocky.
& somethings I try soo hard to hold in but I am unable!
All to familiar yelling.
A few punches to the face.
Tears stream from my eyes.
Shock on your face.
You want to know why tears are rollng down my face?
You want to know why I'm crying this time...
What makes this time different from all the others?
Psychically...I feel nothing. Repeatedly
But mentally?...I'm breaking down.
Does it make you feel better when you hit me?
Does it set all of your anger free?
What pushes you to think...that I am a punching bag?
What drives you to feel relief after you bruise me?
....& when will it end?
Because frankly...I'm tired.
Bruised face...swollen eyes,
But I tell myself that it will be okay.
It usually is.
Where else would the anger go if not to me?
Who would have to recieve it if not me?
But this time, I am tired.
Tired of the threats,
....the mood swings
Tired that you never apologize.
You think it's okay.
You think because you are my shelter...
that you've purchased this punching bag.
But today, I'm just so tired Mama.Too Tired.